Groovy

how to transform the daily grind into the daily groove

Leave a reply

Some people call it the daily grind. But I’m all about the daily groove. I figured this was the perfect thing to post today as a way to metaphorically dust the cobwebs off of this blog.

Let’s start at the beginning…I run a coaching and consulting business with a social mission. I work 7 days a week but I choose to start and end my day by LIVING. About 70% of the work I do is virtual which means that my home is my office, board room, lunch room and castle.

This is how I got my groove.

Fuel up. I find it impossible to do anything well without a good meal. I try to take a clean and balanced approach to food. I love my coffee (decaf, these days) and treats but the bulk of my day is filled with whole fruits, lots of veggies, nuts, vegetarian protein sources and yummy grains like quinoa and spelt bread. I find a little bit goes a long way in fueling my brain and body.

Check-in with your Zen Master. My most important meeting of the day is always a morning check-in with my personal Zen Master. Her name is Khailee and she is a 2 year old all-black shih tzu. She has a very soulful, all-knowing energy about her and that’s all I need to set my day right.

Be insatiable. I am always working toward goals and priorities. Everyday I put together a list of priorities and action items from my workplan for myself both in biz, health and life. As much as I love checking things off my list, I love knowing that I have more to work toward tomorrow.

Pick your moments of genius. You probably already know the optimal conditions for your own productivity and genius. Maybe you are a very early morning person who likes to get it all done quietly while the rest of world is still asleep. Or maybe you hit your creative peak after the kids are in bed or catch a second wind just after your 4:30pm yoga class. For me, I am oddly most productive during very specific periods of the day. For example, on weekdays between 8 and 11am, then again in the late afternoon/early evening between 3 and 7:30pm. But I really rock out on weekends – especially Sundays.  As a result, I can transform myself into a conduit for creativity and innovation at the right times.  (Psst RescueTime can offer some intel for those who haven’t yet found their most productive moments.)

Set boundaries. For me the most empowering word in the English language is “no”. I have learned through painful trial and error that sometimes you have to say “no” to others in order to say “yes” to yourself. So I am very conscious of setting boundaries on myself and my time. Trust me, the anxiety or discomfort that comes with having to say “no” is insignificant compared to the burden you will feel in biting off more than you can chew.

Forget multi-tasking. I used to be the poster child for the multi-tasking generation. I recently stepped down because my brain was too full that I was no longer able to juggle so many ideas. I have resisted the urge to open yet another tab in the browser of my mind. Try it.

Take a confidence vitamin. A positive pick-me-up or break from those hum drum feelings could be what you need. Writer extraordinaire, Alexandra Franzen has a whole whack of confidence vitamins to get your groove on.

Ditch the Debbie attitude. Have you become a Debbie Downer? Negative thinking is an act of volition. Business guru, Marie Forleo suggests giving yourself a spiritual smackdown. I did this recently and it worked wonders.

Contact the complaints department. Little hiccups in life happen every day and they can really get under my skin. About half the time, I forget about them pretty quickly. The other half of the time, I feel the need to state my case to the universe. I’m a big externalizer so in order for me to move on and be able to re-focus on the important stuff, I need an outlet. Usually a quick conversation that lets me get my frustration off my chest is sufficient. I have my go-to people for different types of annoyances. Once its shared, the complaints department is closed. Let it go and move on.

Breathe in. Fresh air can do wonders for productivity. It is a mood enhancer. The other day I opened the outside door of my sunroom along with all of the windows and let that beautiful breeze free flow as I got down to business.

Create your daily soundtrack. When you don’t want quiet, I think it is good to be mindful of the “noise” you have around you. I like music. A lot. I have playlists for everything: my mile run, commute via transit, weekend house cleaning, cooking, different types of work, road trips, etc… Here’s a favourite playlist to get you started.

Carry a personal totem. There are days that I know will require a superhero level of energy, grace and patience. And on those days especially, I carry with me a personal totem like this. That totem changes but usually there is some kind of symbolic or sentimental value attached to it.  Whatever it is, there is something about being accessorized in love that helps me to take on the world.

Show gratitude and love. There are 3 amazing creatures, without whom, I would be significantly less groovy: my husband and my two dogs. But truthfully, there are so many people I engage with on a daily basis that add so much value to my work and life. Collaborators, friends, clients, family, and team members are part of a larger community for which I am grateful. The trick is not just acknowledging that but spreading the word.

These are just some of the many things that I do to transform the daily grind into my daily groove. I am curious to know: what works for you?

P.S. Want more? I’m doing a little #dayinthelife series of photos on Instagram today. Follow me: @kristlect

 


Rocks

To the brave ones

Leave a reply

“He who is brave is free.” ~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca

There is a certain amount of courage and conviction that is required for us all to live our daily lives.

Maybe some days that means having a melt down, recovering and starting again. On other days, that could mean marching right into the dragon’s den with shield up and sword drawn. And still others, it requires the willingness to let go of the known, the ugly, and the stuff that just isn’t working. In making that decision, you hold the space for what’s next – whatever that may be.

Bravery is as much about optimism and foolishness as it is about perseverance and preparedness. It is also as much demonstrated in everyday life as it is in climbing mountains, rescuing those in peril, and standing up to a bully.

Living is not for the faint at heart. And I have begun to appreciate the acts of bravery that we each demonstrate daily as individuals.

Forget skydiving, for some bravery is walking into a room of complete strangers at a social event and striking up a conversation. Nevermind swimming with sharks, bravery could be resisting group think and choosing to be the lone voice and sole vote against something that you simply do not agree with. Maybe bravery is retraining in a completely different field after the loss of a job or overhauling your entire lifestyle to become fit and healthy.

Whatever it might be, know that we are all heroes of our own lives.

So here’s to the brave ones. All of us.

p.s. This post was inspired in part by a group of individuals participating in a Job Creation Program to start new careers after a decade or more of working in what is now a dying industry.

The Nest: Master Bathroom

Leave a reply

Welcome to The Nest. Here it is – the first of many posts about the new house. I have been carefully (and slowly) organizing posts of various rooms/spaces in “the nest”. This has been a fruitful exercise in documenting and remembering all of the changes and decisions that were made to get from the “before” to the “after”. (I never realized how many steps go into these transformations until you actually sit down and take count.) I wanted to start small so this room seemed like the best fit.

[Before] Master Bathroom

Ou est la salle de bain? There is a funny story about this master bathroom. We actually put in an offer on our house within 12 hours of seeing it but despite a master bathroom appearing on the listing, we couldn’t find it when we saw the house. The house itself was an embarrassment of riches. There were so many rooms and doors we lost track of the details. Plus with 2 other bathrooms who cared about the master? When I finally saw it, I was overwhelmed by the amount of work that would need to go into it in order to make it usable.

[before] Master Bathroom2

A blue carpeted floor, rusted sink, extremely inefficient toilet and shower designed to induce claustrophobia were all beyond my tolerance.  My solution: lock the door and use the main bathroom instead. Somehow my husband managed to convince me that undertaking a bathroom reno while the second floor was being overhauled would make the most sense. Although at the time I felt it was a really low priority, I now appreciate the convenience of having a functional bathroom in our room and one that we only have to share with each another and no one else.

[after] Master Bathroom4

The little bathroom that could. We started fresh with a blank canvas and brought this little bathroom into the 21st century. The shower walls were demolished, the plumbing was relocated to the back wall and electrical was moved to a safer spot. We expanded the shower footprint and opted for a frame-less glass surround to make the space feel larger and brighter. It was possible to do this by replacing the 1974 baby blue extra-wide tank and toilet with a modern dual-flush. (Apologies to our neighbours for having to bear the sight of that awful toilet as it sat on our front drive way – for weeks.)

[after] Master Bathroom3

Fashion passes, style remains (Coco Chanel). I find modern tile and pattern really intriguing but if there is anything my 1970s bathroom taught me, it is that trends fade quickly. We decided on marble (various sized tiles) because we felt it would be seamless, classic and stand the test of time. We mixed the tile with silver grey grout instead of white. (By the way, there is more to grout than what they sell at Home Depot.)  Because the tile is cool in colour, we installed a dark wood vanity and mirror to add warmth. We opted for a transitional sink top instead of the usual oval shape or uber-modern rectangular sinks. Finally, after an exhaustive search, we found the perfect shower system which included a ceiling-mounted rainfall shower head with the handheld and adjustable bar.

[after] Master Bathroom2

A low maintenance bathroom for a high maintenance gal. I have always been the one who cleans the bathroom. Even as a kid, that was my job (along with dusting all of the furniture). In recent years, I absolutely loathed the task. Dirty doesn’t even begin to describe what I was dealing with. The worst of it was cleaning the bathtub and keeping the grout around the tile surround mildew-free and white. But our new bathroom has no bathtub and best of all, no white grout!

I have never had such an easy time cleaning a bathroom. The one thing that requires a bit of effort and time is keeping the glass shower surround spotless. Once a week, I get out my Lainnir Shower Glass Cleaner, a damp sponge and a squeegee to clean both sides of the glass of water marks and soap scum. Every second day or so, I spritz a little Method Bathroom Cleaner on the actual shower tile/grout and done! And once a year, we will need to treat the marble tile to keep it sparkling.

[after] Master Bathroom5

A few final touches. With such a small space, I opted not to mess around with too much colour so we went white on the walls and then new baseboards (and vent covers) were added. I decided on a midnight blue for the linens and mat. (It seemed suitable for our lake district digs and even though it is blue again, we steered clear of that lovely powder blue from the 1970s.) The space above the towel rod is begging for a couple of floating shelves like these (sometime in the future) and the door trim needs another coat of white (to be done sooner than later). The bench was intended as an addition for the shower itself. And I did add a bit of personal artwork to the blank walls. (I will share that in another post!)

One room down. Only eleven more to go. ;-)

—

Source List: allen + roth  palencia vanity with matching mirror from Lowes; luxo mabre vanity top from Rona; aquabrass shower system from Taps; hammam stripe hand towels and fez bath mat from West Elm; aspen toilet paper holder from Moen; tile and grout from Olympia Tile.

A note about The Nest: In August 2012, we bought a house….with lots of rooms and lots of potential. Read: fixer upper. The Nest is a series of posts detailing the “before” and “after” of our work as we transform this house into a home.

Paddlewheel Boat 1987

On camera

Leave a reply

Over the last 6 months, I have found myself on camera. A lot.

I used to be in love with the camera. As a child, I was photographed constantly – and not just for family photos. Back in the day, I actually modeled clothing (on camera and on the catwalk) for my mom’s store Teddy Fashions. Such a ham, I was. (Proof above.)  That love affair ended at some point.

In July of 2012 I got my GLAM ON for a photo shoot. It had been 7 years since I had professional photos taken and that was just not OK. Everyone needs a good photo – for conference bios, twitter avatars, and everything in between. I don’t often feel photogenic but in this virtual world, photos and video have become critical tools in creating your brand but also allowing people to become familiar with you.

Kristle-6656

I’m no Annie Leibowitz or Tyra Banks, for that matter, but I can tell you what works for me. When it comes to photos…

  1. Go pro. I feel the DIY route is great for a lot of things but photos in your house or taken by a family member (who isn’t a photographer) just never seem to look polished. Dropping 300 or more dollars on a photographer who doesn’t “get you” is equally bad. So look through their portfolio and get a sense of their style before you commit. I worked with Daniel at Studio 4 POINT 5 for these shots.
  2. Know what you want. I needed shots I could use for my websites and profiles. I wanted the consistency of in-studio lighting and a basic white background so that I could plug these photos into anything. I knew full body shots would be a waste because I would have to crop them for use in profiles and bios anyway.
  3. Primp. I had been rockin’ my shorter do for a few weeks before the shoot so all I needed was a blow dry and straighten at Blo Dry Bar.
  4. Cake it on. I got my make-up done at MAC. It was so abundant (think Toddlers & Tiaras) that I had to walk out wearing big sunglasses to cover up. (I’m typically a bit more of a minimalist when it comes to make-up.) But I knew that despite the copious amounts of dark eyeshadow, foundation, bronzer and blush, only about 20% of that would come through on camera. So cake it on.
  5. Look your part. It was important that these photos were taken of a much more polished version of myself – not Nikki Minaj. So I didn’t wear fake eyelashes or hipster glasses or haute couture.
  6. Bring extra. I often change my mind very last minute about what I’m going to wear to anything – a meeting, event, date night. I had three wardrobe changes for my shoot and brought 6 outfits. I styled each outfit with different accessories again with extra options.
  7. Angle and variety. A head-on shot will look flat so angling your body in one direction and your head toward the other creates a proper silhouette. Make sure you get a variety of shots including from up above. That’s quite flattering.
  8. Break it up. If you are wearing long sleeves or one solid colour or pattern you will want to create space around your body so that you don’t look like a blob. Although I got some comments about my hand-on-hip-model-pose, it actually is purposeful. That is, it gave me shape and a waist!
  9. “Smize”. Smile with your eyes. The above photo is a good example of this. (Even still it didn’t make it to the final cut. The red lips with black suit just seemed too severe and the structured blazer made me feel constricted and shapeless. See tips #5 and #8.)
  10. Have fun. If you think it is painful, then it will be. Move beyond the awkwardness, make conversation with your photographer to help you relax and just have fun!

Now video is a whole other adventure. Most often I am being recorded as a result of a facilitation or training. In those cases, it is almost impossible to control how you are reflected. Since my focus is not to deliver to a camera but rather the people in the room, I just let myself forget it’s there. (Although it can be very difficult when a bright light and lens are a few feet from your face!)

But on other occasions, I am actually on camera for interviews, promos and featured topics. In fact, I found myself on camera back in October and was fascinated to see such diversity of expression in each shot. The result is above. My favourite funny face is the one on the bottom right. I actually look a little afraid. In reality, this is just my normal face when I talk about stuff that matters.

Here are a few guidelines that I try to keep in mind when filming.

  1. Enunciate. This I can’t stress enough. I have been told many times that I enunciate well. I think having a Deaf brother has something to do with that (i.e. he reads lips). The clearer you are with your delivery the more likely the substance of your words will resonate with others.
  2. Memorize. Do your best to memorize your “lines” so that it doesn’t come off as reading script. You are better off to film a few lines at a time but deliver it properly and with intention, than you are to read off of cue card on screen. The only exception to this is when you are interviewing. I feel it is permissible to refer to your question sheet for that.
  3. Smile and animate. I believe in being expressive. Dead pan isn’t my thing. Plus on camera it is boring (unless your are doing a SNL sketch). Assuming you haven’t just been injected with Botox, use your eyebrow and mouth muscles to help convey your message.
  4. Vary tone. You’re not a robot. Enough said.
  5. Ad lib. This tip is most relevant for interviews. I feel it is important to be responsive to what your interviewee is saying so that what comes across is an organic conversation versus an artificial q & a.
  6. Speak directly to your audience. If you are delivering a message to a viewer audience then look into the camera. If you are participating in an interview then look at the person who is asking or answering questions.
  7. Don’t take yourself too seriously. For a 2 minute video, I’m often looking at around 20 takes. You will trip up on your words, forget your lines, go off on a tangent. It happens. Laugh it off and start anew.
[after] Striped Rug

Right now.

Leave a reply

Right now…pattern is my thing. Lately I’m all about stripes, floral and geometric patterns. Could be the start of something new.

Right now… I’m trying to live without caffeine and sugar. It’s not going so well (read: will power is waning) but I continue to try.

Right now…my dogs are taking turns playing “escape artist”. As a result, we are all learning about boundaries.

Right now…my work plan for April is the only thing containing the chaos that comes with a volume of deliverables due in a 30 day period.

Right now…I’m carving out time to run. For only 10 minutes, I still get a 500% return on investment and even I can’t argue with that kind of value.

Right now…the house seems a little less full of life and love as my hubby embarks on a training weekend away in Ottawa. That means a weekend of just us girls (well…plus my brother-in-law).

Right now…we are grateful for having had an abundant and snow-filled winter. And we are ready for the next season. (Earth to Spring? Are you there?)

Right now…I am giving myself permission to clear everything off my desk for 48 hours to focus on ONE singular project that is SOLELY for Inspired Practice. Harmony for an entrepreneur is the balancing act of working ON your business and working IN your business.

It’s Friday. Let’s do this!

The girls

Leave a reply

Winnie FirstsSince the addition of our new puppy to the pack, we girls have been on one non-stop adventure. Winnie has become our resident happy girl. She is outgoing and brave. In her first 48 hours with us, she was already mastering stairs (up and down), comfortable to be picked up and cuddled by anyone, and adoringly annoyingly goading her new big sister to play every 5 minutes.

Win-win (as I call her) wears her partially pink nose and paw pads with great pride. She is goofy and clumsy but very confident. In Winnie’s first week with us, at the tender age of 2 months, she had already experienced the streetcar, subway, an office visit, downtown sights, on-leash walk, elevator ride, etc… That is pretty fantastic and speaks to both how trusting she is as well as how well we were able to transition her into a new family.

Big Sister K

With the addition of Winnie (now one month later), my Little K has become more mature and much calmer. She has grown into her new role with some initial resistance. Every older sibling has experienced that conflicting feeling of on one hand having a dedicated playmate to worship the ground you walk on and on the other hand having to put up with their annoying, needy behaviour. Even still, I have to laugh at the irony of life. I guess what they say is true: what goes around comes around.

Khailee was once the bouncing puppy with endless energy initiating play with every dog at her doggy daycare* (most of whom were twice her size at least). “Did she nap?” I would ask when going to pick her up from her weekly visits. “Khailee? Not a chance. After she would tire out one of the dogs, she would move on to another. She played all day long.” Of course she did. And now she is accosted incessantly to play by a 7 pound fur ball who shadows her every move.

The Girls

These two girls can be a handful some days. Those days include a combination of: muddy paw prints on the only patch of carpet in my house, Houdini-like escapes from the backyard leaving me with heart palpitations, doggie meltdowns at 4am, mama meltdowns at 4pm, inopportune and very loud barking at the neighbourhood cats or mail carrier… I could go on.

But most days are pretty great. There are laps run around our giant backyard and constant play fights. Tandem naps in the sun-filled vestibule and shared treats. And an invisible string connecting Winnie’s very strong heart (or so the vet tells me) to Khailee’s and vice versa.

That is the best part of our pack expansion. And the adventure continues…

*I realize that a doggie daycare is an odd concept at which most people would roll their eyes. That said, I think it is a great opportunity for puppies of all ages to socialize with other canines in a safe environment. There is so much important conditioning that happens while a dog is still a puppy and well before they are technically “allowed” to be exposed to the big bad world (i.e. dog parks, etc…) I credit the dog pack (and human pack leaders who facilitated this) at Fetch with teaching Khailee proper “puppy etiquette” (i.e. her place in the pack, how to respond and engage with other dogs, etc…) as well as helping to ensure that she could interact with different dogs (breed, size, etc…) so that she wouldn’t develop fearful or aggressive behaviours. Now that we have Winnie, I can see how much valuable teaching happens between dogs.

Hello Winnie

Leave a reply

Hello Winnie

For the last 3 months I have been imagining what our family might look like as it grows. At the same time, we began transitioning into our new neighbourhood and home in Etobicoke. It soon became clear that our dog was no longer a puppy and would benefit from having another canine companion. Khailee will celebrate her 2nd birthday at the end of April and now seemed like the perfect time to welcome another to our pack.

I had originally been in search of a male shih tzu to adopt but it seems the universe had other plans for us. We met a litter of 5 (all girls except for one boy). I immediately fell in love with him (boys are so charming) but as Mike and I looked on, we realized that the eldest girl had become enamored with Khailee. (No surprise there. EVERYONE loves Khailee.)

Enter Winnie – an 8 week-old, 3 and 3/4 pound black-and-white furball with a pink- speckled nose.  She was named for the season in which she was born (winter), my hometown and, (besides Charlotte) possibly the greatest non-human literary character of all time.

This little one is already a fabulous fit with our family. We’re all excited about the adventures mini Winnie will bring to our lives.

A.A. Milne wrote: “Sometimes,’ said Pooh, ‘the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.” So true.

Life reset

Leave a reply

photo-1

There is this great line in Season 4, Episode 21 of The Big Bang Theory in which characters Sheldon and Amy come to a crossroads in their relationship following an unexpected kiss. (If you know anything about this show, you will understand why that is discombobulating.) Amy is unsure of “where to go from here”. Sheldon suggests that they restore their relationship to the most recent point where they both agree that it worked – much like resetting your computer. It’s a “relationship reset”.

Twenty Thirteen started fiercely but then half of January disappeared into a vortex of flu and fatigue. So I’m calling an audible and doing a “life reset”.

We’ve got all sorts of crazy good stuff happening right now that makes me feel like changing the play is exactly what’s in order.

The worker bee in me has translated into seriously getting stuff crossed off the home reno to-do list. (Let’s wrap it up. This is no longer a “construction zone”.) Art is changing the scenery in our new home as it gradually makes its way onto the walls. The long-awaited “before and after” posts for The Nest are getting organized.

We’ve got the arrival of our second fur baby this weekend and lots of important prep underway to welcome her to our pack. I’m getting on top of the puppy proofing and working on the transition so that all humans and canines can get into a good, happy groove.

Date nights are any night because that’s how we roll. Spontaneity is not my forte but love respects no boundaries or schedules.

Big progress is being made toward achieving fitness and health goals I set at the start of the year. A return to running and hot yoga is imminent. In January I completed 20 miles during my Mile a Day running challenge (plus a few more that I walked with Little K) before falling ill. It was totally awesome while it lasted and I far surpassed my own expectations in terms of killing time barriers (whoa!). I see another 5k race in my future.

Work is bustling with more facilitation (love!) and travel being scheduled between February and May. Old projects are getting wrapped up which feels deeply satisfying. I’m wiping the slate clean so that new opportunities can surface and re-directing my focus toward enlightened risk-taking for my business and clients. I am expecting this to feel a lot like paragliding – scary yet exhilarating.

My restored life comes with its own soundtrack composed by The Lumineers and a hearty supply of oranges, garlic, brussel sprouts, kale and hulled hemp seeds (Manitoba-grown) to boost the heck out of my immune system.

Reset complete. Next up, LIVE life!

Light.

Leave a reply

There’s a light and I can see it in your eyes. There’s a memory of the way you used to be. Nothing’s gone, it still shines. Every time you turn it on.” – Serena Ryder

Light is my one little word for 2013. It can mean “buoyant” or “airy” or “open” or “bright” or “divine”. It is a word with lots of room for interpretation. (That’s just how I like it.) This word found me back in October. Light became a real struggle for me and it is for this very reason that I am liberating myself in 2013 through this word.

I have focused on a few ways in which I can integrate the concept of “light” into my business, home, health and family life. And I thought I had it down.  Little did I know.

Only three weeks into the start of 2013 and I have already suffered two different illnesses (one which I am still working out of my system) and experienced anguishing delays on moving forward with work which has been enough to drive a results-oriented-control-freak like myself up the wall. What gives 2013? Geez, lighten up already!

Warren Buffet said: Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken. Oof. That’s a sucker punch to the gut, if there ever was one. I thought I would strut into the New Year all enlightened (ha!) but little did I realize that there were a couple of chains I needed to break first. There are so many ways in which we burden ourselves through unhealthy, unhappy physical, mental and emotional habits. Days turn into months which turn into years and we hardly realize the toll.

There are 2 little demons that haunt me in the dark. They are habitual fears. By bringing them out into the light of day, I hope to break free from them. (And in doing so, perhaps offer some perspective to others.)

The fear of “playing big”. With this one comes a whole whack of complicated realities. If I “play big” with my business, will I lose control over the tiny yet manageable little-company-that-could I have created? If I “play big” with my work, will the results of my professional efforts and entrepreneurial risks seem not nearly as impressive as I thought? If I “play big” with my family life, will that change the dynamic between myself and my husband or parents or in-laws or friends? If I “play big” with my public service aspirations and actions, will I not only invite recognition but also judgement?

I think the honest answer to all of these questions is “maybe”. Now if I left it at that, this would suck as a pep talk so here is the addendum: anything is possible when you risk it all to play big. It is just as probable that playing big with my business could offer greater satisfaction by letting go of my tight grip and opening the doors to fresh and capable talent. It is just as plausible that playing big with my work will surface greater self-recognition, even better standards and bigger lessons. It is equally as possible that playing big and growing my family will change the dynamic of my relationships in ways that are unimaginably positive and more fulfilling. If I play big with my service to community, I am just as likely to create a legacy from which others can benefit – regardless of preferences or politics. Playing big is a bit of a gamble. It’s a choice between my desire for change and my love of continuity. It’s a challenge to myself to rip off all of the bubble-wrap taped to my ego and heart. It’s an experiment in truth: the greater the risk, the greater the reward.

The fear of “having it all”. Yes, I really am a contradiction in terms. This might sound crazy but there is a little demon sitting on my shoulder at times that surfaces a fear of success. If I “have it all”, then what will there be to work towards? Many of us spend all our lives working toward something- life goals, career goals, family goals, etc… I would love to be more hedonistic but I know myself well enough. I am a future-thinker. I love to work toward something and then achieve it. Sometimes I don’t even realize how extraordinary the journey was until I reach my destination. Along the way I rationalized that I should “stretch out” the awesomeness and bide my time.

There is a sub-text here of unworthiness. Do you hear it? How many of us have little devils running through our minds telling us that we are undeserving of our dreams and accomplishments? Too many, is my guess. There is nothing wrong with feeling like you have to work hard for your achievements. But at the same time, there is nothing wrong with the ease that comes from leveraging personal or professional strengths built over time to reach your summit. Not every mountain is an Everest. Right? So let’s ditch the self-deprecation.

Next, let’s remember that there is no (known) limit to the number of dreams one can have in each lifetime. Surely the dreams I had as a child have expanded, changed, and multiplied. And arguably, I have already “had it all”. Twice probably. If the fear of “having it all” will somehow mean that I have accomplished everything too early and then just be sitting around for the rest of my life, the solution is simple: dream new dreams.

So there it is. A short yet effective exorcism to start the year. The equivalent of a colonic for the mind. Out with the old, in with the new.

Unchained. Boundless. Light.

p.s. This post was inspired in part by Chapter 2 of Twyla Tharp’s The Creative Habit. Check it out!

This year

Leave a reply

This year…

I want laughter to feel like pink champagne bubbles.
I want my home to feel like a cozy puppy pile.
I want my body to feel like the sun rising over the Western Sahara.
I want my friendships to feel like being wrapped up in my favourite sweater on a chilly Sunday afternoon.
I want my money-making to feel like a snowfall on Christmas.
I want my word to feel like its weight in gold.
I want my facilitation gigs to feel like Idina Menzel hitting the high note in Defying Gravity.
I want being of service to feel like baking my signature vegan chocolate chip banana bread.
I want my philanthropy to feel like a midnight blue sky lit up with a thousand stars.
I want my challenges to feel like the tough-yet-rewarding dancer’s pose in a 90-minute hot yoga class.
I want my love to feel like fireworks on New Year’s Eve.
I want my next success to feel like summiting Mount Kilimanjaro (all over again).
I want the end of the day to feel like a well-deserved perfectly-prepared Daniel-Craig-as-007 martini (shaken not stirred).

Welcome Twenty Thirteen.

p.s. This post was inspired by Danielle Laporte’s Burning Question. Check it out!